I'm in love with you, just not IN love with you
by Luiniliel
Summary: A romantic comedy of sorts. Harry comes out to Ron, who then is insulted. Ron is prideful and Hermione thinks he's gay. Could this get any more confusing? Deals with Mature themes.
1. How the story starts

Authors note: I do not own Harry Potter and I make no profit from this, unless you can count sheer joy.

I'm in love with you, just not IN love with you

Pairings: eventual HP x , RWxHG 

Summary: Harry comes out of the closet. Ron is insulted. Ron loves Hermione, but his pride gets in the way. Hermione now thinks Ron and Harry are both gay. 

A romantic-comedy of sorts.

* * *

Harry was generally a quiet boy. He was never too loud, too boisterous, always polite and well mannered. He cared more for the people around him, than for himself. 

He was also intensely private. It was not often that he would say what was bothering him, and even then the few people he trusted enough with his secrets had to pry them out of his mouth by force.

For the most part, Harry seemed to be an average teenage boy. He was moody, constantly hungry, and had even kissed a girl. It was mostly unremarkable and a saving grace as few in the media cared enough to report on it daily; of course that Skeeter woman would bug a ghost to suicide the way she refused to let some things die, but she was the only one.

For years now Harry often thought to himself of what it might be like to kiss a boy. Not much of a thought, but one that just sort of hung around in the back of his mind, appearing when he would least expect it. Rather annoying, inconvenient the way it always appeared. 

Harry could be arguing with Draco Malfoy and suddenly wonder what it might be like to lunge at the blond haired boy and fall onto the floor lips locked and tongues battling for dominance.

Harry could see the himself and Oliver Wood in the locker room showers late at night, doing stuff, and the way Oliver would moan Harry's name over and over again usually left the green eyed boy gasping for breath in the middle of Binn's lecture hall. 

The worst were the thoughts about his roommates.

Harry could see himself waking up at night to Neville or Seamus opening his bed curtains and sliding in between the sheets next to him. The playful way Neville would lightly scratch as Harry's bare stomach differing from the strong grip of Seamus' hand on Harry's hip. 

Harry would wake up shell-shocked and feeling too embarrassed to look any of his roommates in the eyes as he quickly dressed and scurried off for breakfast in the mornings, sometimes having to return seconds after leaving the room because he had forgotten about Ron.

Ronald Weasley.

Harry was thankful for Ronald Weasley. 

It did not matter what Harry thought about other boys in the safety of his own head, but Ronald Weasley was always a safe idea to turn to when the pulse began to race and breathing quickened to a pace that was unacceptable in a classroom.

Harry loved Ronald Weasley. He loved Ron like he loved Hermione. Brothers, through thick and thin.

Ron was a center, something that stood as a symbol of justice and logic in his head just as Hermione stood as a symbol of wisdom and learning.

"Ron would know what to do. Ron would be able to give me advice." Harry would think before drifting off to sleep. Ron could be irrational and quick to anger, but he was also quick to protect, and if he could be calmed down enough he had a mind for strategy and planning that was undeniably good, better than good even. 

The only issue Harry had was on how to approach the issue with Ron. Hermione would probably be a more logical person to go to for help, but Harry didn't feel like having anything explained to him. He would rather just have someone who would be willing to listen, provide some advice when asked, and just generally keep that information to himself. Harry had the distinct impression that Hermione would try to set Harry on dates and such, to help Harry along on understanding himself or something equally dumb.

Nervousness and tension gripped Harry as he debated with himself. 

He had not doubt that he could hold onto the information for forever, if he had to, but that was unreasonable, also incredibly stupid. 

It hurt a little to hold onto it. He needed to tell someone, and tell someone that he hoped wouldn't reject him for it.

Ron's opinion also mattered slightly more than Hermione's, but that was probably due to Ron being Harry's first friend. 

If Harry was going to say anything, it would have to be within the next few days, soon enough to not lose his moxy but far enough away to build up the courage for it.

He figured it was best to tell Ron after dinner.

There were several reasons behind that logic.

For starters Ron was always more lazy after eating, which meant that he had more time to think, his reactions were usually slower, he was usually slower in movement, and he might even slip into a food coma mid-sentence or conversation.

If Harry could tell Ron when he was asleep, and then even not risk Ron waking up and hearing the most important part, it would be somewhat of an accomplishment in the sense that Harry told someone, even if that person was not awake.

Harry cornered Ron after dinner like he planned.

Hermione had abandoned them to go the the library and look for information for a project that was coming up later on in the month.

"Bloody mental" had been Ron's response after Hermione tried to bring them with her and had left, with a rather agitated air about her.

After that the walk back to Gryffindor tower was slow, and on Harry's part, methodical.

It was still too early for curfew and as long as Ron and he continued on a path that seemed to lead to something important, and not too suspicious of behavior, they would be fine.

Harry gulped a bit as they took a passage behind a portrait that was rarely used, if even known about.

The nerves were suddenly too much for Harry as he stopped walking and slid down the wall, resting his forehead against his knees, arms wrapped around the back of his head.

It wasn't surprising for him to feel Ron slide down the wall and sit next to him, sides touching with his arm over Harry's bent over back.

"If you don't want to talk about it, that's fine."

Harry lifted his head and turned to smile at Ron, his face dimly illuminated from the _lumos_ cast with Ron's wand.

"Ron... I'm gay." Harry's voice was barely more than a whisper. 

Ron blinked, then smiled back at Harry. "How long have you known?" The arm remained firmly on Harry's back, a comfort.

"For more than a while now." Ron nodded while in thought.

"So..." Ron started talking slowly, a bit uncertain about what to say, " So what. You like guys more than you like girls. Big deal. Percy, that arrogant ass, he's gay. That doesn't make me think any less of him, though he is still an arrogant ass."

Harry took a ragged breath and laughed. He felt so much lighter now, better too. Ron joined in on laughing. 

"So, you like boys. Any one in particular that I should know about? Someone I need to threaten? Don't laugh Harry. I take this type of news seriously. Just imagine, now I not only have to look out for Ginny, but for you as well! I am going to have to seriously brush up on my dueling skills because as it is I have to fight both Ginny and her date every other weekend, but now I have to fight whoever you're going to date too!" Ron let out a big breath of air like he was exhausted just thinking about it.

"So, have you told Hermione yet?" Ron rolled his wand between his hands, he was still seated next to Harry on the floor.

"No. I kind of wanted to tell you first..." Ron smiled at hearing that.

"So when do you plan on telling her?"

"Probably tonight, most likely tomorrow morning. I'm not quite sure."

"What time is it?" Ron rolled back a sleeve exposing a wrist watch. "It's pretty late now. We can go to the library and find Hermione, most likely she's alone there and then we can all walk back to the common room. As it is she wanders off by herself too much..."

Harry laughed. "Why are you so worried Ron? Hermione's a big girl, or are you scarred that a big, bad boy will go and steal you Hermione away?"

"Shut up." Ron pouted and pushed Harry until he was laying sideways on the floor. Harry was crying from laughing so hard. There was no doubt in Harry's mind that Ron was feeling a bit jealous about a certain Ravenclaw boy that was seen trying to get Hermione's attention in the hallways, in the Great Hall, in the library, pretty much everywhere Hermione was. Harry let Ron help him up off the floor and the two of them walked towards the library.

Once there they were a bit surprised to find Hermione sitting at a table across from someone. It was late and, save for Madame Prince, Hermione was generally in here by herself.

"Oh there you guys are. I thought you said that you weren't going to come." Hermione had open books and notes strewn across the table, in every which direction as the boy she was sitting with found it annoying to always read everything upside down.

"Oh, Harry, Ron this is James O'Mally. He's a sixth year, like us." 

Ron glared at the Ravenclaw boy before taking his hand and gripping it, strongly. O'Mally flinched from the pressure and, when released, rushed to avoid Harry's hand as he quickly stopped to get his bag and shove in a bunch of papers and books, apologizing to no one in particular while he ran from the library.

Hermione did not look happy. She stood up stiffly and started gathering her things, not saying anything. Ron looked to Harry with an expression that said to say something, but Harry shook his head no and pursed his lips together in a show of how much he was not going to talk.

"So, uhmm... Hermione. Harry has something to tell you. Don't you Harry?" Harry shook his head no as Hermione looked at him.

"I don't have anything important to say." 

"Yes you do Harry." At this point the Trio was alone in the hallway and going through the passage Harry and Ron had already been in.

"No I don't."

"Hermione, Harry's gay and doesn't want to say right now so I'm saying it for him. Harry Potter likes boys. Even finds me attractive."

"No I don't."

"What do you mean you don't? Who wouldn't find me attractive?" Ron was now walking backwards in front of Hermione and Harry, not watching where he was going and fell flat onto his back. Hermione and Harry laughed.

"That is so cold." Ron stared up at the ceiling as Harry and Hermione continued walking past him, having their own conversation.

* * *

Poor Ron. Expect an update within the month. I already have chapter two halfway written but I need to start studying for my finals! 

Review please.


	2. Admiring her guts

I'm in love with you, just not IN love with you

* * *

AN: I do not own Harry Potter. I receive no profit from this. and it is a definite AU so be prepared for some inconsistencies.

* * *

Hermione and Harry stepped over a fallen Ron, who was a little bit shell-shocked apparently.

"Damn bloody bastard, I really wanted to tell you myself Hermione." Hermione giggled and shook her head.

"Figures, Ron would have to blurt it out, can't keep a secret for too long that boy." Hermione turned and flashed Harry a genuinely happy smile.

"I'm glad you finally came out Harry. This makes things soo much easier for me and Ginny in the match-maker department." Harry stopped and looked at her, a little bit like a deer in the headlights.

"You knew!" Hermione suddenly realized what she said.

"Ermm, oopsie?"

Harry shook his head. "So what gave it away?" Hermione smiled softly, she got worried for a second there, but Harry seemed happier right now than he had in a long time, it was genuine and not a show for close friends.

"Well..." Hermione stopped and thought for a moment. "I'm not sure, it was just something I picked up on, like how you were with Cho, I could tell you genuinely liked her, but it also wasn't like most boys. You never stared at her chest like any of the other guys, Ron in particular, despite how low she would sometimes wear her blouses. That and your fashion sense. You have impeccable fashion sense. At first I thought it was just because the Dursleys made you wear those HORRID clothes, but after a little bit it just started to seem too well put together. NOT that I'm making you into one of those stereotypical gay men."

Harry faked a stab through the heart. "Hermione! God, basing my sexuality on fashion alone. Haven't all those book taught you anything?"

Hermione faked a pause in conversation. "Actually, not really. I mean I pick up things hear and there but it was actually from a Witch's Weekly mag that I began to realize." Hermione giggled a bit more girly than what was usual from her. Harry rolled his eyes and turned his head over his shoulder, checking to see if Ron had caught up with them yet.

"The fat lazy bastard might have fallen asleep."

Ron quickly jogged, catching up to them. "What do you mean fat and lazy?" Ron threw his arms around both the shoulders of the two short people in front of them. "I have you know that I only eat so much because I am a growing boy, and I need my energy. Mom says so too, why else would she end every letter, 'Ron, make sure you eat your vegetables.'" Ron laughed as Harry and Hermione looked at each other and rolled their eyes in unison.

"But seriously mate, what do you mean I'm not attractive?" Ron withdrew his arms from around the two of them, allowing Hermione to cough into her hand and double over, trying to hold back her laughter. Harry blushed a bright pink.

"I didn't mean it like that Ron. I just meant that I'm not attracted to you. Not that I have anything against gingers."

That was Ron just had to start. "Oh, so now you don't like me because my hair is red." Harry was about to retort when a smooth, drawling voice spoke out from the shadows.

"About time you began to realize Potter, association with Weasley's gets you nothing, except an eye-sore room full of gingers."

The emotions of the group seemed to change in an instant. Ron was angry, as usual, Harry was upset and righteous, and Hermione no longer laughed into her hand, seeming ready to pull her wand and jinx every strand of hair on his body to either disappear or turn the brightest red imaginable.

Draco looked as calm and cool as ever. His back leaned against the wall with his arms crossed in front of his chest, one hand already holding onto his wand, pressing it against his left shoulder. Harry was the one to break the silence.

"Can it Malfoy, or are you still jealous that Ron is a better best-friend than you could ever hope of becoming, or is it still because I chose him over you. And guess what, I still chose him over you, always." Harry's words were particularly vicious this time around.

Draco quickly stepped off the wall, and with his left hand flipped back his hair that was let loose from its usual stiffness. His neatly pressed black slacks seemed to contrast with his shirt, let loose of being tucked in and unbuttoned to his mid-chest. He turned and walked away into the direction the trio has just came from.

Hermione, ever vigilant, yelled after him. "Curfew is in ten minutes." Draco continued walking, raising a hand as if to bat her words away from behind him.

"I'm a prefect, in case you don't remember. Little miss mudblood bookworm." Ron would have leapt at him, if he didn't already turn the corner and go out of sight. Harry and Hermione already both instinctively held onto one arm each.

"Damn ruddy bastard. I dare him to one time stay, not backed up with his two goons, and just let me go at him." Hermione was the one to calm him down.

"It's ok Ron. He's just saying those things because daddy's locked away in Azkaban and now no one wants anything to do with him, good riddance, but he wants attention. Even negative attention."

"Come on Ron, it's like Hermione says. He just wants to get a rise out of people. Don't listen to anything he says. It's like a broken record. All he knows are the same taunts and insults."

"Record?" Hermione sighed.

"Its a muggle device Ron. It's actually an old one but the saying stuck. It just means that he repeats the same things over and over."

Ron's stomach at that time actually had the audacity to rumble. Harry laughed at him while Hermione just crossed her arms and scolded. "How do you even manage to get that hungry in an hour Ronald Weasley!" Ron smiled and shrugged his shoulders.

"Don't know, but I do know that I'm gonna run over to the kitchens real quick and grab me an after-dinner snack. Can I borrow your cloak Harry?"

"Sure Ron." Harry slipped the shrunken thing out of his pocket and handed it to Ron.

"Harry!" Hermione was getting ready to go into full lecture mode. "Don't encourage his delinquent behavior!"

"So? Either I let him borrow it and sleep sweetly tonight, or I stay up all night with his stomach rumbling ferociously keeping everyone up. You forget Hermione that I share a room with that walking stomach." Hermione rolled her eyes.

"Ron, you could lose your prefect privileges. (pause) Ron?" Hermione looked around, but Ron had either already left or was just hiding underneath the cloak. "Damn that boy. Come on Harry, curfew is in three minutes now and the last thing we need is to get caught by Snape just outside our common room."

Hermione might not be able to completely boss everyone, but ever obedient Harry stepped up the pace and they made it to the common room within the time.

Harry and Hermione situated themselves in front of the fireplace and waited to either hear Ron's soft knock or for their medallions, like the ones from the DA, to light up. The difference from these medallions was that it only worked between the three of them and they carried it constantly as a security measure. The ever genius Hermione created them to change not only numbers but words as well, so messages could be sent, the best part was that if someone lost their wand a quick squeeze with their thumb would cause the others to burn, alerting the other two that one was in danger. Hermione wore hers as a ring, it was shrunk in size and resembled an old Italian coin, much like some tourist souvenir. Harry's was attached to a leather cord bracelet he wore, a hole was punched out in the center and it stayed locked through that. Ron's was attached to the back of the watch he wore.

Harry and Hermione's coin warmed up briefly with little words on the diameter of them changing. 'Snape outside door. Not moving.' Harry and Hermione briefly whispered with their heads huddled together catching the attention of Seamus who was studying together with Dean at a table not too far from theirs.

"What's the matter guys?" Harry and Hermione looked around before waving the two of them over.

"Ron's stuck outside but Snape is most likely positioned there so he can't get in."

Seamus muttered, 'Damn bloody bastard under his breath.' While Dean just rubbed his chin thinking. Dean called over what looked like a first or second year.

"Hey, could you do me a favor and just step outside for a moment. I need to prove something to my friends."

The girl narrowed her eyes for a moment. "Is something bad going to happen to me? Because my friend said nothing bad was going to happen when I ate a canary cream but I ended up falling through the canopy atop my bed and breaking an arm."

Dean looked affronted. "Nooo. Nothing is going to happen. We just need to let open the door to cool off the common room for a moment, besides, where is your Gryffindor spirit?"

The girl narrowed her eyes at him again. "If something happens I'm going to kick you."

She then went and opened the portrait door very wide open, leaving enough room for Ron to sneak in, but still felt the sudden brush of soft fabric against her shoulder.

Snape stared at her. "Miss Brower, is there a reason why you are stepping out of the common room past curfew?"

Alice Brower shook her head and spoke in a very soft voice. "My friend thought that she heard a noise coming from outside, but because she was scared she didn't want to see what it was. I told her there was nothing scary...," Alice sighed and spoke even softer to the stone floor, "but I guess I was wrong."

Snape just pointed and sent her back into the common room, slamming the portrait door shut and angering the Fat Lady.

Everyone who had gone quiet to see the exchange of words between the two snickered and then started laughing loudly. Alice actually had a big smile on her face. "I can't believe I said that to a professor." But then she coughed and looked very serious at Dean Thomas. "Some Gryffindor, sending a little girl out to face the bat." And then she kicked his shin, going back to her little group of friends who all clapped her back and cheered her.

Dean rubbed his shin, her feet were quite sharp. "There, problem solved. Ugh, that's going to bruise..."

Ron appeared from the direction of the boy's dorms carrying a large basket filled with some of the left over deserts from dinner. Dean, Harry, and Seamus all helped themselves to it, Ron fruitlessly trying to bat their hands away.

"Hey. Stand out there for twenty minutes next time waiting for that overgrown bat to move." Ron took a large bite of triffle he had brought. "Who was that girl that opened the girl? I moved too fast to really pay attention to her face, but I heard her little comment." Harry pointed to the group of second years now calmly studying.

"She's the one with the large smile on her face." Ron nodded his head up and down, took out a slice of pumpkin pie and handed the, still incredibly full, basket to the second years.

The six years were a little bit amazed. He had to defend his decision. "She got my respect." They all had to agree, that and for Ron to give up food was a bit of an amazing thing, kind of like watching angels being born or Snape turning good. That stuff didn't happen to often, if ever.

* * *

* * *

OK, so maybe not so much action in this one, but I swear. Next chapter it picks up. The main storyline will be written out.

I already started work on chapter 5, though it is incomplete, I figure I can hold on to the releases and give myself more time to work. So expect weekly updates, until I run out or forget. I doubt it though. This one is pretty interesting, and I have to say of the stuff I normally write, this might end up being my favorite.

Its already seeming to come out like a real slice-of-life story, and I LOVE those.

Please read and review. Getting reviews in my email helps me remember to update. Even the stories I didn't get a review for.


	3. I think I almost choked

I'm in love with you, just not IN love with you

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AN: I don't own Harry (freaking) Potter. Though I like to make him gay. He's a pretty gay boy. :)

* * *

Harry laughed with Hermione over a bowl of oatmeal in the morning. The bookworm's mood was surprisingly light that morning as she constantly made jokes about nothing in particular, that nothing mainly being Ron.

"Can you believe Ron? He is so presumptuous sometimes, like that time he assumed that you and me were doing something private in Grimmauld Place and didn't want to be disturbed, when we were actually studying!" Hermione threw her head back in laughter. "Remember how much trouble he got into with Mrs. Weasley when she found him lying outside the door, in the middle of the hallway, taking a nap."

Ron grumpily sat across from them and slathered grape jelly over his toast. "It wasn't my fault. I don't know what I heard, but it sounded like you two didn't need my help."

"No, that because you needed MY help; honestly, the lies you make up just so you won't have to study." Hermione giggled. That summer Ron had to finish a portion of his homework after the Sorting Feast because Hermione had refused to help him after the amusing incident. Then, he told Harry what he thought the two of them were doing, which led to Harry laughing so much that when he tried to help Ron, Harry couldn't even speak properly, his mirth getting in the way.

"Harry, tell Ron what you told me that he said."

"Ron, I'm not sure if you are aware of this but you are absolutely mental. You told me that you thought Hermione and I were making out in the room when you weren't there." Harry smirked at Ron who's skin was slowly matching his hair color.

"It wasn't my fault. The only thing I could not figure out is how it happened so fast. I only left the room to pee and get a drink of water." (_And that Hermione wasn't with me..._) Ron thought silently. Harry knew of Ron's longtime crush on their female counterpart, but neither boy was quite certain of Hermione's own feelings towards Ron. Would she return his affections, or would it ruin something good?

Hermione and Harry laughed boisterously while Ron quickly turned a glowing pink. Ron was going to ignore their laughter and bury his head in his breakfast, the most important meal of the day, not that every meal was equally important, but Hermione grabbed his hand that reached for his eggs. "We have to leave early this morning and head to herbology. Professor Sprout is handing out the plants that we will be doing research on and I am not willing to get scrawny one. Lets go." She let go of his hand and it collapsed on the table. Harry and Hermione already had the straps of their bags over their shoulder and were waiting for Ron to stand with them. Ron leaned forward and banged his forehead against the table. "I forgot my bag in the dorm. I'm going to have to go get it. Go on without me."

Ron could hear Hermione's eyes rolling as she sighed and shuffled the bag onto her back.

"I'll go with Ron, Hermione. We'll meet up later at the greenhouses. Now _come on_ Ron." Harry faked pulling Ron's arm up to the dorms until Hermione left the dining hall. Harry had to ask Ron now, "Is the coast clear?"

"The coast is clear." Harry then pulled Ron's backpack out of his book bag and sat back down at his spot in the dining hall. Harry looked at his watch, set the timer for 8 minutes and the two of them began to chow down.

"Huneffee, ---mioone ---wasy -o g- --ass earry." Ron spoke with his mouth full, and Harry really only understood a fraction. Harry motioned with his hand. "Outside" and continued eating with one hand, while the other put together a breakfast sandwich from the toast, eggs and sausage on the table. Ron didn't seem to think quite to clearly as that because he just grabbed a napkin and started piling in pieces of bacon, toast and egg before tying it into a little bundle and throwing it into his bag. Harry's alarm went off and the two of them set out, half-walking and running to get to the greenhouses while trying not to choke on the last of their food they were still chewing. Ron gasped and breathed heavily for a moment, waiting for the big glob of food in this throat to pass down. "Honestly, Hermione always wants to go to class early." They reached the greenhouses in record time and sat down next to Hermione, who had her book open and was re-reading that day's assigned reading. The two boys resumed eating again. Hermione's little agenda beeped, 'Class in five minutes.' She started packing her things back into her bag but she caught sight of them.

"Boys! I appreciate you getting here on time, but put your food away before the professor sees it."

Ron spoke with a mouthful of food, "Why?"

Professor Sprout heard the last of the conversation. "Because dearies we're working with African man-biters today, not as vicious as the man-eater variety, but they still like to nibble, and smelling like food will only encourage them." Sprout unlocked the door for greenhouse three. "You three can stay a while outside as it seems none of the other students have arrived yet, ah, here they come."

Ron and Harry finished up the last of the food and wiped their hands on the grass. Professor Sprout looked them over, "Wash your hands in the sinks and work with gloves and masks today. Wouldn't want the man-biters to take a lip or finger off now."

Ron and Harry walked towards the back of the greenhouse where the sinks were. Ron turned to Harry and made fishy lips. "Harry, do you thinks my lips are in danger of being bitten?" Ron batted his eyes at Harry looking extremely ridiculous. Harry laughed and then in a very teasing falsetto voice.

"Stop it Ron, I'm not going to kiss you. Heehe hee hee." The two of them started laughing loudly and Ron splashed water at Harry from his hands. Hermione walked over from the bench they were to be working on that day.

"Come on boys, I don't want to be the only one working today." She threw towels at them to dry their hands before practically shoving the gloves on them herself. She snapped the masks on a bit painfully as well for making her wait, and for allowing her to do that to them like little children. Both Ron and Harry rubbed their nosed with their hands through their gloves.

"That really stung Hermione." Harry took his glasses off his nose. Ron pulled Harry's hands away from his face and inspected to make sure that the nose piece hadn't broken the skin. Hermione fretted over Harry.

"I'm so sorry Harry. Ron, let me look at him." Hermione accidentally bumped against Ron.

Ron lost his balance.

Ron barely caught his balance, but was stuck leaning forward.

Harry on a normal day didn't have good vision, but he would like to think that his other senses more than made up for it.

Harry was absolutely certain that Ron's arm, the one that took off his glasses, and was still holding on to them was putting pressure on his left shoulder. He wanted to shrug it away.

Harry was stuck though. Ron's other arm, that was initially holding Harry's chin up so Ron could inspect for possible damage in the light was still holding onto his chin. Ron's grip was strong actually.

Harry couldn't move.

Harry also couldn't move his mouth to tell Ron to get off of him because something incredibly warm and soft was pressed up against them. Harry moved his mouth and he could tell that Ron's lips were chapped.

RON'S LIPS WERE CHAPPED!!!???

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YEAY~! The fun starts here folks.

Please R+R. It helps me to know that people like my work.


	4. My arse, it hurts

I do NOT own Harry Potter, I just like the gay boys.

I'm in love with you, just not IN love with you

* * *

Harry also couldn't move his mouth to tell Ron to get off of him because something incredibly warm and soft was pressed up against them. Harry moved his mouth and he could tell that Ron's lips were chapped.

RON'S LIPS WERE CHAPPED!!!???

HUH!!!!

Harry regained control of his body and pushed Ron away from him. He couldn't see, but he got the distinct impression that his eyes were most likely crossed from trying to focus. Jittery hands gave Harry back his glasses and the world came back into focus again, despite the roaring blood in his ears, and the jitters in all his movements.

Ron's face was red, bright red, so red his hair was put immediately to shame. "I... uh... I..." Ron stuttered.

Harry shook his head, sort of like he was trying to shake water off. "It's...," Harry took a deep breath and sighed again, "It's O.K. I could sort of tell that you lost balance from the weight you put on my shoulders."

"I'm sorry. Hermione bumped into me and I, errm... sorry."

The two of them looked at Hermione. She had tears in her eyes and was positively beaming with joy.

"I... uh... I... I didn't know. I'm so happy for you two. I didn't mean to interrupt." Here face was flushed with small tears in her eyes.

Uh oh. Harry's and Ron's face fell. Harry immediately, out of habit because being a celebrity meant strange stalkers, looked around but saw everyone working diligently on their plant, or rather fighting heroically against their plant. "Thank god, no one saw." Ron heard that come from Harry's mouth and he sighed in relief.

Unknowingly it only worsened the problem. Hermione smiled widely and winked at them. "Don't worry. I won't tell anyone." Hermione then giggled and scurried off to go back to work on the plant.

Ron looked positively frightened. "Harry... what did she mean by that?" Harry looked at Ron with a rather fearful face as well.

"I dunno Ron, but I don't think it's good." At the moment however Professor Sprout waved them over to go work with Hermione. The little issue could wait because they had more pressing matters of trying to fend themselves from a nibbling plant.

* * *

Harry carried Ron's bookbag for him, Hermione walked ahead, lecturing on pretty furiously about how irresponsible it was to have a piece of bacon wrapped in a napkin in his back pocket.

Ron hobbled. His right ass cheek hurt. He's just lucky that having a robe as part of a uniform meant that he could lose the back pocket of his trousers and still be covered.

But before going to see Madam Pomfrey he wanted to get a pair of clean, not with any big bite holes on the ass, trousers.

It was pretty painful for Ron to get up the stairs to enter Gryffindor tower. The large step to enter the common room was pretty painful as well, the smaller steps to get to the actual dorm room felt like hell.

Ron stopped walking and flopped himself face first on his bed after opening the curtains around it. Harry walked to his bed and deposited the book bags on the floor in the middle.

Ron groined in pain. "Harry."

"Yes Ron." Harry was sitting on his bed setting his wrist watch for 20 minutes until lunch time.

"Harry. My ass hurts."

"I could assume Ron." Harry started laughing again, rolling backwards onto his bed clutching his stomach.

Class had gone fine, except for the last five minutes when Ron turned around to borrow an extra water spray can from the table behind him and gave the plant, which actually attempted to go behind him all class before hand, an ample target to aim for, especially when he dropped the can and bent over to pick it up.

Bending over to reach a can on the floor all Ron knew was that all of a sudden something clamped onto his butt cheek hard, he screamed, it let go, and everyone in class was laughing while the professor ran basic diagnostic tests and a simple healing spell that would get him far enough to Pomfrey for the real medical help.

Still face-down on his bed Ron kicked his shoes off and tried to get up enough to undo his trousers and get new boxers and pants but the pain was just too much. Ron was really only successful in getting off his belt and undoing all the snaps.

"Harry. Help me up. Please?" Harry finally got over laughing enough to help Ron stand again. Ron tried to push his pants down but it hurt to bend forward. Ron pouted. "Could you also help me get my new pants please." Harry sighed and picked out Ron's underwear and pants from his closet/cabinet combo. Harry actually picked up Ron's underwear with the tips of his thumb and index finger, and tossed it to the bed, causing it to actually land on the floor.

"Gee thanks." Ron then slid off his pants, and wiggled out of this underwear. Harry laughed at that too, though he spent a majority of the time looking away.

The underwear being on the floor actually helped Ron because he was able to just step into the proper leg holes... but then he couldn't bend down to pick them up... he could try, couldn't he?

Ron pressed his hand hard against his ass cheek, as if to hold it in place while he slowly, and with a whimper, bent over to pick them up. Harry looked over to see what was taking so long when he got a bird's eye view of the damage.

Harry whistled. "Ron, your ass has teeth marks in it."

Ron grumbled. "I know. I felt them. ALL."

"Hold on." Harry pulled his wand out of his back pocket and poked the center of the bite mark. Ron went owe.

It was unfortunately while doing that the rest of their dorm mates barged in, demanding to see the ass in question. Harry let them, and Ron flipped them all off, daring them to kiss his ass.

Seamus at that moment just had to add in, "And make it better." All the boys laughed and Ron finally worked his way slowly back to standing pulling his boxers on, all good and proper.

"You all are a bunch of ass holes."

Seamus was going to add something else but Dean beat him to the punch. Ron flipped them all off again, the two finger salute flying high.

"O.K. Since all you worthless scum are done gawking, would anyone help me pull up my trousers please?"

Then almost as immediately as they came, they left. Harry shrugged his shoulders.

It was actually when Harry was helping Ron dress that Hermione walked in, then walked back out, face red.

No, she didn't see anything, but she thought she saw something.

Harry and Ron looked at each other. "Damn. We are really going to have to talk to her." Harry nervously ran his fingers through his hair, pushing it backwards and making it messier.

"The question is now, will she listen?"

Ron looked at Harry like was crazy. "Listen? We'll make her listen. Damn it. I was actually just working up the nerve to finally ask her out before that prick does but now he's not going to feel threatened because I'll just be her over-protective gay friend!" Ron narrowed his eyes and looked at Harry. "Harry."

Harry felt a little bit intimidated by Ron's new ferocity, so he stayed quiet.

"You're gonna have to help me out with this."

And inwardly all Harry thought was, "Oh crap."

* * *

UH OH indeed.

I guess some people were shocked by that last one, in fact I even changed the characters to make it seem like it was, but no, this is a platonic Ron and Harry friendship fic with romance hopefuls for the two of them. Ron is desperately chasing Hermione and Harry... well... Harry will have some triangle action but no say yet on who's the winner.

Please read and REVIEW~!


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